Things I Did In The Bathroom This Week.

We used to have this 67-year-old Swedish man (or something) "following" this blog...but he recently realized what I meant by "skanky hooker", and disbanded. Sad panda! And now he's going to miss these Great Moments in Pottydom from this past week.

It all started with Shmaniel buying the house a new toilet seat and cutting out the "asiento para bano" part of the box. He put it in my room, where it was accidentally blown over somehow, so when he asked me if anything looked different in my room, I said "Uh, a random strip of cardboard?" Upon his laughter, and me investigating and turning it over, I decided a good home would be above our siento para bano (is that even a correct translation?).

In another, more enchanted, better-painted bathroom than our own...I planted my second "You Are Beautiful" sticker! It's at the Kopi Cafe, which is a wonderful place. I just wanted everyone there to know how freakin' tasty they are (though someone probably took it down now, eh?).

Lastly, this morning I randomly thought about my dry-erase marker, and kinda did some scribblin'. Already, certain people are not amused, but these are pretty great in my opinion. I suggest you all give it a try:

I like how one of these happened when it was sunny, and the other when it was cloudy.

To close, a Mom and Kym moment.

Kym: I feel like I'm going to die alone.
Mom: Well, you were born alone.
Kym: I dunno, I'm pretty sure you were there.

Dear Government, Thanks in advance for teh monies! Love, Kymba

iPod cord found. Ska downloaded. Listened on way to post office. Mailed tax return forms. Waiting for check. Skanked.

Also, greeeeeeat moment from David:

Kym: I got inner peace and shit.
David: That *must* be hell.
Kym: How do you figure?
David: How are you supposed to function if you're not constantly indignant?

Great thing, or GREATEST thing?

Ganked from ign.com!

Dear Japanese Lady Ska Band Ladies Of ORESKABAND,

Have you seen my snorkel?

Love,
Kymba

P.S. Would it be culturally insensitive to say "Konichiwhyaren'tyouinmybed"?
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Apologies if the above offended anyone. Feeling like a goof today.

Anyway, I thought I had a lot to say right now, but apparently I don't. Work is good, and last week I made ratatouille for the first time! It is purty tasty, especially served on creamy polenta that has melted fontina in it! The pictures were less-than-irresistible, though, so we'll save that for another time.

Both crocheting and knitting had come to a bit of a halt, since I:

1) cannot find size 13 double-pointed needles to finish my hat for Warm Woolies; and
2) I lost the two balls of yarn that were meant to make a crocheted bear hat (with little ears!).

Cleaning my space always seems to result in me losing stuff (like my iPod cord, which has severely diasabled my ability to put new ska on my iPod). Luckily, the yarn turned up last night, though the iPod cord has not. Wish me luck on THAT one...stupid clean room being less efficient than stupid dirty room...

P.S. New Pom&Clem today over Tumblr way! ;)

Ska En Espanol Part One!

Ska en Espanol? YES PLEASE! Oh, sure, I know I talk about Reel Big Fish like they're the only ska band ever, but today we're going to give some mention over to what I'd almost call the Argentinian version of Reel Big Fish...kidding, each ska band is special and amazing. Today we're going to give a quick saxophone ska solo to the Faaaaaaabulosos Cadillacs.

If we could compare RBF to LFC, it would only be regarding how long they've both been around. Well, technically Los Fabulosos Cadillacs began seven years earlier, in 1985, but the band lamed out from 2001-2008, so I consider them about the same...or something. That is a pretty impressive stretch of ska-maraderie! Yes, I realize that only two of the members have remained throughout the evolution of the band, but it is still impressive that they've kept such a great sound going.

Ganked from TheSceneStar.typepad.com!

Los Fabulosos Cadillacs are pretty, well, see the name - and they're coming to Chicago in April! Woo hoo! Tickets cuestan muchos, man, but it might be worth it to see the band who helped start the Ska Revolution of Buenos Aires. Also, Erika keeps making jokes that she's already bought them, but I can't tell if she's kidding or not...

Classy Kate Moments

Kym: I once made an almond joy latte; It was awesome!
Kate: Kym, you make me feel almond joy, 'cause when I look at you baby, I wanna bust a nut.

Kate: I want a librarian to biblioteca-me-out-on-a-date!

Tonight Erika and I bought Whole Foods Two-Bite Brownies and went to the bookstore to find The Fat Girl's Guide To Life. Sadly, it was not in stock, ruining what might've been a chuckle-worthy moment at the cash register.

Now I have Business Time stuck in my head from good iPod/Zenny car time.
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Dear Electric Six,

Why you no have tickets for Chicago?! I wanna see me somma this!

Love,
Kymba

When Skanking Turns Ugly...Or AMAZING!

During an intense skanking session today...well, we'll just let the pictures speak for themselves, shall we?

It was pretty outstanding. My first response, besides to finish singing my favorite part of the song, was to do a simple mental poll:

Q: Am I in the basement?
A: No.

After finding that important answer, all was good and fine. Luckily, there was some kind of panels or thin support under that (possibly part of our heating system), or I could've had my leg/crotch end up in a really awkward and scary position dangling over the basement (though you can see the basement as the light part of the picture above).

The accident was 80% the floor, since one of the short panels was
actually made by two even-smaller panels. I mean, it was
100% my outlandish greatness.

Dear Reel Big Fish,

I do believe I should be named your Most Hardcore Fan of the Week. At least until the next idiot busts a hole in his or her floor.

Love,

Kymba

NyQuil Made Me Do It.

I'm not going to lie, but I am going to make ridiculous excuses about it being decongestant-related...I spent about an hour and a half today watching parodies/remixes of Beyonce's "Single Ladies" video, a song I hated until this guy:


It was all my phlegm-filled brain could take today. Here are some of the other ones that I enjoyed greatly, due to deliriousness (click pictures to go to the videos!):


Yeah, it was a pretty messed-up afternoon. Sorry. But if you're sick, it's pretty amazing.

You can't make this shit up. Or maybe you can.

According to Wikipedia:

"Nikola Tesla, Mark Twain, and Bertha von Suttner combine forces to try to bring about world peace through superior firepower. The comic's introduction shows Twain explaining that the story does not concern itself very much with historical accuracy, and this assertion is borne out by the story: Twain and Tesla use scientific know-how, general trickery and media manipulation techniques to try to scare world leaders into following their noble path. In the company of several allies, the two are soon confronted by dark forces led by the dastardly Thomas Edison, John Pierpont Morgan, Andrew Carnegie and Guglielmo Marconi."

The dastardly Thomas Edison. For real.

Ugh, so, I'm sick. But this'll give me more time to lie in bed and knit.Except when I have to work.

Why, yes, work. I managed to score a little unofficial job with some candidates running for local office, helping with events and organizing their hoards of paperwork and computer files that haven't been in at least two years. It's kind of a giant mess, but the woman is super-nice, and I definitely like organizing [when it's not for myself]. Plus, it's purty tasty to have a little cash coming in during my work-downtime, and working for a campaign is great fun, as well as helpful to teh resume. My fantastic three-year plan involves working for local government while taking culinary classes and saxophone lessons, which'll set me up for politics, owning a bakery, and starting a ska band...what?

Now, gonna down some tea and NyQuil and knit until I pass out drooling on myself and said knitting. Rock on!

Hey! You forgot the hotties!

It occurs to me that this blog has covered me being a hooker, but not being skanky. For now, I will simply advise that during fabulous baking parties you should listen to Canadian indie rock out of Montreal, such as Malajube or Les Breastfeeders, and that all super-sexy cooking time be done with ska, particularly Reel Big Fish or Save Ferris. But don't take my word for it (okay, do), try it yourselves. This is kind of a big deal.

So, apparently knitting isn't dead in my life. The crazy middle-aged ladies knitting ministry got in some chunky wool yesterday, and it is huge, and, you know, maybe I'll give it a try. This will also be my first excursion into circular needles, which the fabulous Kate currently swears by - though I heard blasphemous mention of "double-pointed needles" escape her yesterday. Of course, this assessment is coming from the woman who went completely AWOL.

Moving on. In addition to making a spectacular croquembouche, one of my New Year's resolutions is to read ten books. So far I have read two. One of them sucked so terribly I would prefer not to mention it, and the other is Silent Spring by Rachel Carson. I majored in Environmental Studies and Political Science, and yet we were never required to read this book, even when we read Sand County Almanac and Encounters with the Archdruid (which I would consider similar). Next is a book on John Coltrane, followed by Opening Up for the Feminist Book Group.

Soon, my sweet. Soon.